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Ruth Kennedy

How can I reduce worrying thoughts?

Updated: Feb 8, 2023


The word ‘worry’ comes from a combination of two Greek words; ‘merizo’ (to divide) and ‘nous’ (the mind) (Lucado, 2022). Therefore, to worry is to divide the mind between the priorities of today and the problems of tomorrow, whether they are potential problems or real challenges (Lucado, 2022). This tends to result in half-mind living, where we never fully engaged in the present moment, as we are constantly planning towards the future (Lucado, 2022). While worry has evolved as a cognitive mechanism to protect us and keep us safe, the constant misuse of our imagination in conjunction with keeping hypervigilant and primed towards any potential threats may leave us feeling exhausted, overwhelmed, unhappy and trapped.


Worrying thoughts typically fall into one of two categories; those which are irrational and those which are rational and legitimate.


Irrational negative thoughts are the main thought pattern associated with anxiety, as when we are feeling anxious our rational, logical thought processes tend to be replaced by unrealistic or irrational thoughts. Additionally, as cognitive neural pathways become more entrenched the more we think in a particular style, we end up automatically thinking negatively, without giving a lot of consideration as to whether the thoughts we are telling ourselves are actually true or helpful.


Therefore, the first thing that is needed to reduce irrational worrying thoughts is to evaluate them by considering if there is any evidence to support that these thoughts are actually true (Vivyan, 2009). Also, it may be useful to consider alternative thoughts or responses, perhaps by contemplating what someone else would say about the thoughts (Vivyan, 2009).


Many irrational thoughts that question our abilities begin with the premise “What if….”. Another way to consider looking at these thoughts is to counter the "What if….” thoughts with “So what”. For example, if you were telling yourself that you would like a new job, but were questioning whether you were confident enough to take on a particular role (such as asking yourself “what if they think I am not the right kind of person for the job?’), consider asking yourself “So what?”. Face this fear, what is the worst that can happen in this situation? At the end of the day, it really doesn’t matter if they don’t think that you are the right kind of person for the role, do your best and apply for the role anyway.


Excessive rumination of worrying thoughts deepens a negative state and another way to reduce these irrational thought patterns is approaching life mindfully, which is the living in the present moment while simultaneously not attaching to any particular thought or feeling. Mindfulness can be achieved by breathing techniques that bring back a wandering mind to the breath, using a particular phrase or mantra repeatedly, drawing intense focus to our senses, or just sitting with a feeling or thought and noticing it, without reacting to it.


Another antidote to worry, relaxation techniques, allows the parasympathetic nervous system, which is the nervous system associated with resting and digesting, to dominate while allowing the sympathetic nervous system, the system associated with flight or fight and the dominate system when we feel anxious, to take a break. Relaxation techniques used to reduce anxiety include breathing with a longer exhalation than inhalation, progressive muscle relaxation, where the focus is on working from the head towards the feet and progressively tensing and then relaxing the major muscle groups, and guided visualisation.


While many of these relaxation techniques are able to be completed independently, being guided in relaxation techniques within a therapy session means achieving a deeper level of relaxation, which is something that many clients with anxiety have mentioned that they haven’t experienced for a long time.


The second category of worrying thoughts is those which are legitimate problems, such as worrying thoughts surrounding being diagnosed with cancer, a warning given at work for poor performance, or a final eviction notice. While a constant unrealistic catastrophising thought pattern is rarely helpful in these situations, neither is putting up a wall and not acknowledging any fear. For legitimate problems, setting aside ‘worry time’, gently considering the situation and perhaps the worst-case scenario, and, more importantly, problem-solving and thinking about what you will do in this situation using non-negative responses, while mentally rehearsing potential solutions connected to how you are going to handle the situation, are some strategies to tackle legitimate worry (Jones, 2018).



References


Jones, D. (2018). Understanding and Treating Depression: How to lift depression fast and create lasting change. Udemy. https://www.udemy.com/course/understanding-and-treating-depression/



Vivyan, C. (2009). Depression thought record sheet. Getselfhelp.co.uk


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